Wandering

I feel like I fill time with letting my mind wander. When I hear nothing from you, I create my own inner dialogue. 

Some truths. Some lies. But I don't like it. 

I would rather have just one word from you, God. I would rather not have to fill in the gaps with my own thoughts of how life should be when all I need is just one small, teeny word from you. 

God that's all I'm looking for. I want to talk to you. It's hard walking for you when I don't feel like I have you guiding me. It's hard living for you when I am doing it all on my own. I would rather just have something from you. 

Anything at all. 

It can be a big word or a small one. I don't care God so long as it's from you. Because I'm so in need of you. I'm tired of working. I'm tired of doing it on my own. I'm tired of forcing it. It's not natural nor is it supernatural. 

I need the One who created me to breathe life into me again and say, "You are my beloved in whom I am well pleased." 

I want to hear your voice because I'm tired of the world's noises. And I'm tired of my own. I'm incapable of survival. I'm unable to thrive. God, without you I am nothing. 

You have given me meaning. You have given me purpose. You have given me a destiny. 

You have called me. Created me. Formed me. Loved me. God, I need your word like a baby needs his mother. 

I'm dependent upon you. I need your word because I've been in a draught. And I thought I had it figured out but I don't. God, come and speak a new word over me. God, come and breathe new life into me. God, come and be my God. 

You have said and you have promised that you would never leave me nor forsake me. 

So I ask that you would remind me of that. I know you're still there and haven't left me, but for my benefit, tell me that you love me