God of it all

Lord forgive me for I have sinned.

I don't want to offend you by offering up a fake prayer, so give me a sign that you're there.
I know you're busy and there are so many people for you to help, but I would appreciate if you sent some my way. 

I would love a cloud by day and fire by night, but I don't need something that extravagant. I wouldn't mind my back to be healed, but that's not really something I need. 

I could use some gold coins in some fish's mouth. 

Maybe that would help to remove my doubt.

I am never opposed to a mighty fire from heaven setting altars ablaze, but maybe those are miracles of yesterday. But I don't think so. 

No, I think you're still at work. 

And you need a little faith first. You need me to do my part and to not harden my heart. I guess what I'm trying to say is that God, I would really just love you to show up. 

And I have so much hope in your presence that gets negated by my cynicism. 

I don't mean to sound pessimistic, but I just haven't seen you work in a real long time. 

And I know you're doing plenty of stuff, but I want it in this life of mine. I mean just blow me away. Blow these questions away. 

Blessed are those who believe who have not seen, so I guess I'll just have to hold onto that verse. 

But I would love to converse with you and ask you, God, why not now?

 Why not show up?

 I always told myself that I would know you better by the time I grow up, and here I am still trying to figure this whole life thing out. 

So shake off the dust of uncertainty and remove my insanity because I want to be secure in you and you alone. I could use a miracle to help me believe but I have seen you in my heart and I know who you are. 

You are the God who saves. 

The God before me. 

The God behind me. 

You are the God who does it all.