Oh my God, how could you choose someone like me? I've been bruised and beaten. I've been defeated. I'm not good enough to do your works. There must be someone better to go throughout the earth. I can't be who you want. You need someone bigger and stronger and wiser and smarter. You don't need a regular guy like me.
I'm a nobody.
I'm insignificant.
Surely, You can do better than me. Surely there's someone else far away who can do a better job than me. I'm just a speck of a man. Oh god oh god, can't you just get someone else?
I know these are just excuses, so please excuse my wining and complaining. I just can't comprehend that you would want someone like me. I don't have all my ducks in a row. I still have room to grow. Well this I know, I'm just a regular guy. But I guess that's why I'm surprised to see that you'd choose someone like me to work in your kingdom.
I'm no philosopher or poet or musician or orator. I'm just some random guy. And I wonder why you would pick me on your team.
It's because of your grace. It's because you give strength to the weak. You empower the meek. You clothe me in righteousness. You come to my defense when the enemy attacks. You're molding me and shaping me into a laborer of your harvest, and I know I am a long way out. But can you help remove my doubt?
Give me strength. Give me peace. Put my anxiety at ease. Release me from the bondage of self deprecation.
Set my feet on the path to heaven. Give me boldness to proclaim the gospel all over the earth. Give me courage to touch the broken and hurt. Use me. Grab hold of me and direct me in your ways. Let me see your face oh god. Remind me of who I am in you.
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